The Taming of the Shrew Strong-Willed Toddler

I hereby announce that I have the sure-fire method for dealing with a strong-willed toddler!

NOT! But I will share what’s working at this point and time. Any day now, Little Pea may decide she’s on to me, and change tactics altogether. I’ve read a few snippets of the book, “Parenting with Love and Logic,” and everything I’ve read seems brilliant! You have to use your intuition with each child to see which methods are most effective.

Little Pea is two, and in that “I do it!” stage. She wants to do what she wants to do, and nothing else. I’ve found a way to make her do what I want her to do, while making her think she has a choice.

For example, we are in a store, and she doesn’t want to leave with me. She stands there and exclaims, “NO!” In the past, I’ve resorted to spanking threats, and even carrying her out the door screaming. However, this question has been working like magic lately:

“Would you like to come yourself, or should I come and get you?” Like clockwork, she’ll say, “my. self.” and… get this… she actually comes with me! Some other great questions are:

“Will you put your shoes on yourself, or should I come over and do it?”
“Can you sit at the dinner table, or do you need to go to bed?”
“Would you like the red shirt, or the pink one?”

You get the point. Anyway, try it… see if it works for you.

Two wonderful books I’ve read are “The Strong-Willed Child” by James Dobson, and “Parenting with Love and Logic” by Foster Cline and Jim Fay

So what works for you?.


  1. i KNOW that you are NOT talking about my sweet Ava! however, the parenting with love and logicis truly the best parenting book/system ever. mostly, just because it is just simple common sense! you instantly remove the parent/child power struggle and that is the biggest help!

  2. A lot of the struggle is all about independence! So give them some choices- that are still within your control. Not if you want to leave or not- but how to leave like you did!